One month after marrying the man she loved, Shannon Moroney’s life was traumatically altered. She was away from home at a teachers’ conference when police knocked on her hotel door and told her she needed to come home. Her house in Peterborough was a crime scene and her husband, Jason, was in police custody after confessing to violent sexual assault and kidnapping two women.

Shannon’s story, published in October by Doubleday Canada, is a raw honest account of how her husband’s crime impacted her life. It’s a story of grief and stigma, but also compassion, restoration and forgiveness.

On Saturday, March 3 at 7 p.m. at the south campus of Canadian Mennonite University, Shannon will tell her remarkable story. The event is hosted by Mediation Services in collaboration with MCC Manitoba and St. Leonard’s Society of Winnipeg.

“Shannon has a unique perspective. She has suffered as a victim of crime, and was also very close to an offender,” said Lois Coleman Neufeld, director of Mediation Services. “She was compelled to look beyond the justice system for the tools she needed to heal. Her story is a convincing argument in favour of alternative and diverse services for victims and offenders to ensure a safe and healthy future for our communities.”

The event on March 3 is also the launch of a newly formed organization of citizens concerned with improving the quality of justice for victims, offenders and community members. The St. Leonard’s Society of Winnipeg, along with MCC Manitoba, is undertaking an innovative project in Stony Mountain Penitentiary that engages victims, offenders and community members.

Shannon will be available for interviews on Friday March 2. For more information about the event or to arrange an interview, please contact Mediation Services at (204) 925-3416

This Friday, January 27, at the Mennonite Heritage Centre Gallery, an interesting show is opening up. The featured artists have all been deeply impacted by crime – by the murder of a family member or close relation.

When I have the opportunity to speak about Restorative Justice, I often talk about it as a philosophy or a theory. Most frequently, I explain it as a way of living – a practice. This art show stretches my imagination to think about Restorative Justice as expressed by creative individuals using mediums other than words.

The show runs until March 10 – check out the Gallery’s website for hours – and come, prepared to be moved.

For those of us working in Mediation and conflict resolution processes, we see people make resolutions all the time. They certainly don’t all happen in January. But throughout the year, we see individuals and groups make decisions to live differently, to respond to others’ actions in a different way, and to be less judgmental of others without knowing the context.

These resolutions are often called agreements – and there is an accountability factor in them that is often missing from New Year’s resolutions. As mediators, we monitor agreements and encourage participants to meet their obligations. In some cases, there are family members that hold the participants accountable. In some of the best cases, the persons involved in a conflict hold each other accountable. Just like resolutions that fail, agreements can also fail if accountability is not a reality.

Resolutions also fail because they are unrealistic – and agreements that are unrealistic often fail as well. Agreements built on the principles of Restorative Justice need to be reasonable, and as much as possible, respond in some tangible way to the harm done. A number of years ago, we saw an agreement reached where the accused was responsible for completing 60 hours of community service for shoplifting less than $10 worth of goods.

In many businesses, nonprofit organizations, and social service agencies, the acronym “SMART” helps us define “good” goals.
S= Specific
M=Measurable
A=Attainable
R=Relevant
T=time limited
I never thought about making my New Year’s Resolutions “SMART” – and neither have I deliberately used the acronym in my work in conflict resolution – but it makes a lot of sense. How do you ensure you remain balanced in the agreements and resolutions you make? I’d love to hear from you

For many, this time of year makes the reality of difficult relationships more poignant. While others enter a season of parties and fun, many stay at home alone because of damaged relationships and pain associated with those realities.

At Mediation Services, December festivities remind us of the importance of relationships and the work that is necessary to maintain good relationships with those around us. Daily, we see relationships that are broken because of a lack of communication or assumptions made about others’ motivations for their actions. We see how good intentions lead to misunderstandings, and accusations result in divisiveness. We see how harm caused by another person creates confusion and mistrust.

There are moments of truth in an oft-seen movie this time of year – Home Alone. In a church on Christmas Eve, the main character, Kevin, meets his neighbour, Marley, who, Kevin learns, had an argument with his son many years earlier and has not talked to him since. Kevin, in his youthful innocence asks Marley what he has to lose by reaching out to his son and taking the initiative to rekindle the relationship. Marley has no good response.

Repairing relationships never happens without work, without a willingness to take a step towards the other person. It doesn’t always happen like in the movies, but when people are willing to work at it, surprising (and good) things may happen.

We at Mediation Services wish you many healthy relationships this season!

At almost every place I spoke, the common refrain was, “Why haven’t we ever heard about this service?” I nod in agreement, and say that we’re working to change that!

We have quickly learned that our job is not only to help people think differently about conflict but to let them know there alternatives exist. I dream of the day when there will be 100s of advertisements in the city proclaiming that there are many positive ways to resolve conflicts, and that anybody can access those tools!

At the same time, although we don’t have billboards, we have many people who support our work – who are willing to tell their friends, neighbours, family members, and co-workers that there is a service that can help them. Let us know how we can support you to spread this word even more broadly – and in the meantime, I’ll continue to speak, every chance I get, and invite others to spread the word, too.

As The United Way Campaign says, “Together, we CAN make a difference.”

It is always exciting for me to see that individuals and organizations all over the city believe that they can make a difference. This year’s nominees fit into this group of people who, more often than not, work quietly behind the scenes and characterize themselves as “ordinary folk.” And like the nominees in other years, this year’s group have helped others accomplish extraordinary things.

This year, we celebrate five people nominated by people who know them well:

Sharon Taylor: Sharon has many years experience leading community development, bringing opportunity, safety and support to families of her community.

Edith Von Gunten: Edith is the woman people go to when they need help or support. She exemplifies social justice through her love, patience, kindness, humility, encouragement, hope and prayer.

David Mouland: Involved at Winnipeg Harvest, Dave has a commitment to building a community where people feel purposeful instead of helpless, optimistic instead of hopeless, and strong instead of powerless.

Eleanor Ulasy: A role model to many in her community, Eleanor exemplifies life long learning, community participation and activism in the neighbourhood in which she lives. She strives to blend the values of social justice into daily living.

The winner of this year’s award is: Karen Mozdzen: Karen is a school counselor who works in many ways to better her students’ lives, increase options for families, and promote safer schools. Between 1992 – 2002, Karen worked under the direction of Mary Wolfe to coordinate the peer mediation program at West St. Paul School. She has also worked to create spaces in schools for empathy and interpersonal conflict resolution where all students and community members are accepted and valued.

Congratulations to all nominees and to those who nominated them. Our communities are better because of you!

OPTION 1:   You are invited to take part in a rally being organized at the Legislature, to call on the Manitoba government to follow the lead of Newfoundland, Quebec and Ontario and the Official Opposition in British Columbia in opposing Bill C-10, the crime omnibus bill currently being rushed through Parliament. The rally will be at:
· The Legislative Buildings, North entrance on Tuesday, November 8th at noon

Unfortunately, comments made yesterday by the Attorney General for Manitoba Andrew Swan, reported in the Free Press (see attached) suggest that Manitoba currently favours the Bill, which among other things would immediately aggravate overcrowding in Manitoba jails and siphon much needed money away from social programs and other crime-fighting initiatives– quite apart from that Bill C-10 will do nothing to reduce crime. Therefore it is important to bring out as many people as possible to tell Manitoba we need to ‘get off the omnibus’ if we want to have money left for the kinds of initiatives that do reduce crime, address poverty and build stronger communities.

The Rally will focus on
1. The human cost of Bill C-10
2. The cost to communities, both in terms of squandered dollars, and lost human resources
3. Asking why we should pay for a ‘strategy’ that doesn’t work?

Option 2:   Friday morning (November4) on CTV morning show, Wilma Derksen will be a guest talking about her perspective of Bill C-10.

Option 3:  Go to www.leadnow.ca and send a letter to your Member of Parliament. Every voice counts!

Option 4:  Engage others in the conversation – what are meaningful ways to be SMART on crime?

It is a good setting for us to explore the impact of culture on conflict. Earlier this summer I facilitated several evening workshops for newcomers to Canada on various aspects of conflict. The participants all wondered how conflict is dealt with in Canada.

I find this question perceptive – and difficult. It is perceptive, because these individuals, many of whom had lived in several different countries before settling in Winnipeg, understand that not all people resolve their differences in the same way. They also realize it is important to know how to address conflict if they are going to survive here. And, upon further discussion, I was relieved to learn they knew there would not be a simple answer.

Just as each culture has special food and drink and dances that distinguish it from other cultural groups so with conflict, each culture has its distinct and ideal ways to address differences. As guests at Folklorama pavillions, we carefully watch, observe, and ask questions to learn what’s happening, to understand the story behind the presentation. When we are involved with other cultures, these same skills are important if we hope to succeed in building meaningful relationships and in overcoming conflicts when they happen.

PS. If this topic interests you, check out our Culture and Conflict course at www.resolutionskills.ca

In previous posts, I have tried to help spread information about other jurisdictions and the effectiveness of more prisons in deterring crime, so I won’t repeat that here.

What I do want to focus on is this: if there are going to be more prisons, where will we be able to find opportunities to put restorative practices into place? What does it mean to work restoratively in these settings?

There are some exciting initiatives happening, which we at Mediation Services watch with interest. In one setting, meetings are arranged between surrogate victims and offenders who want to take responsibility for what they have done. In another, offenders meet regularly to discuss justice and what justice means as they move into the future. In the past, encounters were arranged between victims and offenders, with both parties having an advocate, and a professional mediator facilitating the conversation to ensure safety. In prisons all over Canada, volunteers visit those in prison. In many cases, the relationships continue when the person is released from prison.

These initiatives are not big and they don’t generally garner a lot of attention. But, in most cases, they are individual’s and communities’ attempts to work restoratively in an environment not conducive to such initiatives.

At Mediation Services, we are interested in these initiatives and understand their importance to address the needs of victims and offenders in their search for meaningful justice.

What solutions have worked for you?